Signs and Wonders (Written by Marlin, not by Kim—Sorry Kim) Operator Error!

“Faith Without Works is Dead!” Brother James

I need to see action to have faith. And I have to act to sustain my faith. Because of these two realities in my own lived-out journey, faith/believing is daily work. Interacting with others, whether Christian or otherwise—mostly Christians—helps my faith. But, of course, the opposite is also true. The greatest challenge for me to continue self-identifying as Christian is other Christians.

Probably the single most helpful aspect in my life to strengthen my faith is my work with the program Refresh. Every Wednesday night a group of us show up to feed a meal to around 70 people experiencing homelessness or who simply have food insufficiency. We provide showers and fresh clothing and mail service and social workers and respect and care and even love maybe.

Managing the kitchen has been important to me and is an expression of my belief that God works through the hands of humans—like me.

When I am around the 70 or so “losers in life”—those chained to addictions and burdened with mental illness—I see myself. And I see God too, or at least, now seeing them and looking them in the eye, now acknowledging they exist, I see the part of God I can’t see in any other eyes but these. And what do I see in the eyes looking back into mine? I see the desire to be known, the longing for connection, and this with an extremely low bar. A nod, a smile, a dollar or two—not too much to ask.

To Know Me is To Love Me?

So, there’s Mike. When we began Refresh, Mike was a mess. Mike is a meth addict and every Wednesday he showed up high. He was angry, not safe, foul mouthed, and deeply troubled.

Mike sought help. And then, Mike got help. He didn’t find Jesus, he simply found some people who cared enough to offer sanctuary, which, come to think of it, might be like finding Jesus. Yeah? Mike’s been clean now for several months. And the metamorphose is dramatic. Mike is a happy, engaging person. He is gentle by nature and kind. His eyes are clear and bright and I look forward to seeing him. This week he sided up to me and asked, “How many did ‘we’ feed tonight, Marlin?“ (I loved the “we”.)

“76, Mike. 99 meals counting seconds.”

”Wow! Remember when we started?”

”I do.”

”We’ve grown, haven’t we?”

”We have.”

”I’m grateful to all of you.” He said it with such sincerity that I wanted to hug him. I didn’t because we don’t do that, but I wanted to. (Keeping safe personal space is essential both for the clients and the volunteers.)

And Then There’s …

There’s Deb with her dyed red hair and jerky movements, unbelievable resiliency, and great sense of humor. There’s tall, lanky Don, who is on and off the wagon and who rolls his own smokes. Every Wednesday night, Alphonso—shy, unassuming, almost invisible Alphonso—shows up. He has a speech impediment that makes him hard to understand, and he is so obviously aware of that fact. Yet, he’s there and he’s sitting with others and he’s talking. And they don’t make fun of him, because they all know how it feels to be laughed at.

I can’t forget to include Francisco who takes 30-minute showers, and John, who calls out from the back of the line—“Hi Pastor Marlin, how are you?” And then there’s Teo, whose name means “uncle”, and who acts like he’s everybody’s uncle including mine.

The Kitchen Family

Then there is a group of volunteers who work with Sally and me in the kitchen. There’s Pat, an 82-year-old fireball, and Dave, an edgy, funny guy who does dishes, and Jamie, who makes 30+ PBJ sandwiches every Wednesday night. And there’s Phil who does drinks and sweeps up at the end of the night. And Sandy and Mike and and Jay and Jack and Paula and Mary and Meagan and Jane, who subs for me when I am gone and makes the best tortillas with rice and beans. There’s Janet H, the radical Mennonite, and Janet C, the closet specialist. Pete and Kate are new and so willing to do whatever needs doing.

Vern and Fred and sometimes Tim and always Mary run the showers. Martha and Stephanie check in people and offer 1st wave hospitality. The two in charge of this operation, LuAnne and Scott, mostly keep out of the way while mostly keeping things from spinning out of control—it’s a big job.

Finally, there’s Bill. When we started Bill was living out of his truck. He is an ex-Army cook who knows his way around a kitchen. Shortly after we started Refresh, Community Action House helped Bill find a home. Bill adopted the rest of us as his family. At first we were only serving sack dinners and as few as 8-10 people came by. Then Bill convinced us to serve hot meals and we jumped on board and served the best food we could make. Word got around and the downtown Methodist Church became a destination point on Wednesday nights.

Feeding Jesus

So many good, decent people show up to help folks like Mike. Some of us are Christian and some of us are not—no matter. We are a family. Alongside of us are three churches who each come once a month with fresh bodies and good food—UCC, Fellowship and Intersection. Amy, Joan, Sarah, Linda, Wilma and Javier carry the load for these good places.

”Jesus ate well tonight,” I’ll say.

”He did,” will be the choir’s response.

Signs and Wonders!

My faith is not strengthened through reading the Bible or going to church or a Bible study—all good in and of themselves. Every name I named above is a person, a real person, and each one of them is a sign and a wonder. Without them and others like them I would not have faith in God or in humanity. I don’t look for, manufacture, or even need miracles. I try not to ignore or dismiss them either, which is not easy. These days I rarely ask God for anything or expect anything from God either, at least not directly. I just thank God for everything good in my life, especially the good people I’ve named above.